Human Relations Quotes

ONE SMALL ACT OF KINDNESS: An old man was walking along the beach with his grandson. His grandson picked up each starfish they passed and threw it back into the sea. “If I leave them up here,” the boy said, “they would dry up and die. I’m saving their lives.” ” but ,” protested the old man, “the beach goes on for miles, and there are millions of starfish. What you are doing won’t make any difference.” The boy looked at the starfish in his hand, gently threw it into the ocean, and answered: “It makes a difference to this one.”

10 COMMANDMENTS OF CORRECTING: 1. Thou shalt remember prior good deeds before thou passeth judgment 2. Thou shalt be aware that mortals err, often inadvertently 3. Before correcting, thou shalt find out what happened and why 4. Thou shalt not lose thy temper while correcting 5. Thou shalt not call employees “creative names” 6. Thou shalt not dredge up old misjudgments 7. Thou shalt make sure that all previous tutelages were received with clarity and understanding 8. Thou shalt check for insufficiencies in the skills of the error- maker 9. Thou shalt make thy corrections in private 10. After correcting, thou shalt discuss how such activities will be done in the future

10 COMMANDMENTS OF REWARDING: 1. Thou shalt seek out productive behavior 2. Thou shalt keep in mind that positive feedback to the employee is as the winds are to the eagle 3. Thou shalt offer gentle and frequent praise 4. Thou shalt reward valiant attempts as well as partial accomplishments 5. Thou shalt praise quickly after the event 6. Thou shalt remember that rewards declared in the presence of peers will multiply the power of the praise 7. Thou shalt tailor the reward to fit the deed and the doer alike 8. Thou shalt keep in thy memory that rewards yearned for by the accomplisher are the most appreciated 9. Thou shalt know that dollars are not the only reward 10. Thou shalt know that the language of the body can be as powerful as the speech of the tongue

ETHICAL MUSTS: The six core ethical values parents should be teaching and modeling for their children, according to the Aspen Declaration on Character Education are: 1. RESPECT 2. RESPONSIBILITY 3. TRUSTWORTHINESS 4. CARING 5. JUSTICE AND FAIRNESS 6. CIVIC VIRTUE AND CITIZENSHIP

How to bring out the best in others: 1. Ask your people to share their ideas 2. Welcome change 3. Set challenging goals and measure performance 4. Be generous with feedback 5. Reward initiative 6. Develop people who show special potential

Use non-verbal communication to SOFTEN the hard-line position of others: S = Smile O = Open Posture F = Forward Lean T = Touch E = Eye Contact N = Nod

As a result of trying to solve the “big” problems we face in life, many of us end up sacrificing individual relationships by doing things that we may consider as being small or insignificant at the time. This reminds us of the George and Gracie routine where George asks Gracie, “How do you cook a pot roast?” She replied, “I put both a big pot roast and a small pot roast in the oven. When the small one is burnt, the big one is done just right!”

When bitten by a poisonous snake, what’s the best thing to do? Remain quiet, suck the poison out. What’s the worse thing to do? Get upset, chase the snake and kill it. When unintentionally or intentionally the victim of an unkind remark, what’s the best thing to do? Forgive, move on, let go of the anger and resentment. What’s the worse thing to do? Strike back, harbor resentment and anger.

A Smile costs nothing. Yet it’s worth so much. It happens in a flash And the memory sometimes lasts forever. It cannot be bought, begged, borrowed or stolen, But it is something that is no earthly Good to anyone Until it is given away. So, if in your hurry or rush You meet someone who is too weary To give you a smile… Leave yours. For no one needs a smile So much as he who has none

The Value of a Smile: An electric lineman once came in contact with a live wire, and the left side of his face was paralyzed. The jury in considering the damages, asked him to smile, but he could only smile on one side of his face; they subsequently awarded him $100,000 damages. If half a smile is worth so much and yet costs nothing then we certainly ought to have it in good working order, ready for constant use. However, we should remember that one who doesn’t smile is no better off than one who can’t smile.

TRUST: Many organizations (unknowingly) operate by the 97/3 rule. This rule postulates that 97 percent of all people tend to be honest, loyal and hard working. However, 3 percent are sociopaths and not to be trusted. Many organizations, due to fear of the sociopathic element, put systems in place to protect the organization from the things the 3 percent might do. Unfortunately, these systems are then applied to the 97 percent as well, who feel, as a result, that the organization doesn’t trust them.

A man at a pay booth in a restaurant was overheard by the restaurant manager making a call. “Hello, Mr. Smith?” he was heard to say. “I understand you have been looking for an assistant.” He paused to listen to the response. “Oh, you hired one two months ago and are pleased with your choice? Well, thank you anyway. I hope you continue to be satisfied with your decision.” When he hung up the phone, the restaurant manager commented, “I happened to overhear your conversation. I’m sorry you didn’t get a shot at that job.” “Oh, that’s all right,” the man replied, “That was my boss. I was hired as his assistant three months ago and I was just phoning to find out how I’m doing!” Employees like to know how they are doing. When was the last time that you as a manager gave them some positive feedback? – or do you wait until they ask or call you?

I’d rather see a sermon Than hear one any day; I’d rather one should walk with me Than merely show the way. The eye’s a better pupil , And more willing than the ear; Fine counsel is confusing, But example’s always clear. I soon can learn to do it, If you’ll let me see it done; I can see your hands in action, But your tongue too fast may run; And the lectures you deliver May be very fine and true, But I’d rather get my lesson By observing what you do. For I may misunderstand you And the high advise you give , But there’s no misunderstanding How you act and how you live.

Think about the qualities of the best managers you ever worked for. You’ll find that most of them: – were approachable and easy to talk to – rarely became overexcited or flew off the handle – didn’t let a few problems poison their whole outlook took a friendly, pleasant, positive approach – showed consideration for the feelings of the people who worked for them

You can buy a person’s time; you can buy their physical presence at a given place; you can even buy a measured number of their skilled muscular motions per hour. But you can not buy enthusiasm . . . You can not buy loyalty . . . You can not buy the devotion of hearts, minds, or souls. You must earn these.

Trust Builders: 1. Empathize 2. Remember the little things 3. Keep commitments 4. Clarify expectations 5. Be loyal 6. Sincerely apologize

How do they train killer whales to jump over the rope at Sea World? Do they hang a rope 20 feet over the pool and then shout to the whale “Up, up, up!” No. They start with the rope under the water. When the whale swims over the rope, it gets rewarded. Then the rope is gradually raised. Each time the whale swims over it, again, a reward is given. How often do you give a “reward” to those with whom you work? Only when the final goal is reached or do you give praise along the way as incremental progress is made?

Rules for Being Human: 1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period this time around. 2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called life. Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may like the lessons or think them irrelevant and stupid. 3. There are not mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial and error and experimentation. The failed experiments are as much as part of the process as the experiments that ultimately work. 4. A lesson is repeated until learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can then go on to the next lesson. 5. Learning lessons does not end. There is no part of life that does not contain its lessons. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned. 6. “There” is no better place then “here.” When your “there” has become a “here”, you will simply obtain another “there” that will, again, look better than “here.” 7. Others are merely a mirror of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself. 8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours. 9. Your answers lie inside of you. The answers to life’s questions lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen and trust. 10. You will forget all this.

A Short Course in Human Relations: The six most important words: I admit I made a mistake The five most important words: You did a good job The four most important words: What is YOUR opinion? The three most important words: If you please The two most important words: Thank You The one most important word: We The least important word: I

The Four Agreements (A simple but powerful code of conduct for attaining personal freedom, true happiness and stress-free relationships and encounters ) 1. Be impeccable With Your Word 2. Don’t Make Assumptions 3. Don’t Take Anything Personally 4. Always Do Your Best

I took a piece of plastic clay And idly fashioned it one day — And as my fingers pressed it, still It moved and yielded at my will. I came again when days were past; The bit of clay was hard at last. The form I gave it, still it bore, And I could change that form no more. I took a piece of living clay, And gently formed it day by day, And molded with my power and art A young child’s soft and yielding heart. I came again when years were gone; It was a man I looked upon. He still that early impress bore, And I could change it never more.

The Drug Problem I had a drug problem when I was young: I was drug to church on Sunday mornings. I was drug to gatherings of friends and family no matter the weather. I was drug by my ears when I was disrespectful to adults. I was also drug to the woodshed when I disobeyed my parents, told a lie, brought home a bad report card, did not speak with respect, spoke ill of the teacher, or if I didn’t put forth my best effort in everything that was asked of me. I was drug to the kitchen sink to have my mouth washed out with soap if I uttered a profanity. I was drug out to pull weeds in mom’s garden and flower beds and cockleburs out of dad’s fields. I was drug to the homes of family, friends, and neighbors to help out some poor soul who had no one to mow the yard, repair the clothesline, or chop some firewood; and, if my mother had ever known that I took a single dime as a tip for this kindness, she would have drug me back to the woodshed. Those drugs are still in my veins and they affect my behavior in everything I do, say, or think. They are stronger than cocaine, crack, or heroin; and, if some of today’s children had this kind of drug problem the world would be a better place.

When you shout obscenities, you downgrade the game, the public – and the way you’re going to be remembered, says Rod Laver, the two-time winner of tennis’ Grand Slam. Asked the worst thing he ever said to an umpire, Laver replies, “It would have to have been, ‘Are you sure?'”

Six ways to make deposits to build an emotional bank account: 1. Empathize 2. Remember the Little Things 3. Keep Commitments 4. Clarify and Fulfill Expectations 5. Be Loyal 6. Sincerely Apologize When You Make a Mistake

DROP A PEBBLE Drop a pebble in the water, just a splash and it is gone. But there’s half a hundred ripples circling on and on and on. They are spreading, spreading, spreading, and the ripples rise and fall. While the music of their swelling brings a thought for one and all. As you watch the waves of water as they widen round and round. Think how simple were their starting, just a pebble from the ground. Drop an unkind word in carelessness, in a second it is gone. But there’s half a hundred ripples circling on and on and on. They are spreading, ever spreading from the center as they go, And there’s not a way to stop them once you’ve started them to flow. And perhaps in some sad heart, a mighty wave of tears you’ve stirred, And disturbed a life once happy when you dropped that unkind word. Drop a word of cheer and kindness, in a moment it is gone. But there’s half a hundred ripples circling on and on and on,. Bearing sons of hope and gladness on each buoyant joyous wave, Till you’d not believe the volume from the little thought you gave. And you’ve rolled a wave of comfort, whose sweet music may be heard. Circling miles and miles around you, just by dropping that kind word!

VARIANTS ON THE GOLDEN RULE: – As ye would that men should do to you, do ye also unto them likewise. (Luke, King James Version) – What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others. (Confucious) – He has observed the Golden Rule ’til he’s become a golden fool. (William Blake) – I do unto others what they do unto me, only worse. (Jimmy Hoffa) – Treat others the way they want to be treated. (sometimes called the Platinum Rule) – Absolutely speaking, Do unto others as you would that they should do unto you, is by no means a golden rule, but the best of current silver. It is golden not to have any such rule at all in such a case.

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered. Love them anyway. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Do good anyway. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway. The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds. Think big anyway. People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs. Fight for a few underdogs anyway. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them. Help people anyway. Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway. It is reported that a version of the above was posted on the wall at Mother Teresa’s orphanage for children in Calcutta, with the following verse added at the end : You see, in the final analysis, it is between God and you. It was never between them and you anyway.

We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse. For my grandchildren, I’d like better. I’d really like for them to know about hand-me down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meatloaf sandwiches. I really would. I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated. I hope you learn to make your bed and mow the lawn and wash the car. And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen. It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old dog put to sleep. I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in. I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother. And it’s all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he’s scared, I hope you let him. When you want to see a movie and your little sister wants to tag along, I hope you’ll let her. I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely. On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don’t ask your ‘driver’ to drop you two blocks away so you won’t be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom. If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one. I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books. When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head. I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what Ivory soap tastes like. May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole. I don’t care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don’t like it. And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend. I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma and go fishing with your Uncle. May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy at weddings and the birth of a baby. I hope your Mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through a neighbor’s window and that she hugs you and kisses you when you bring home a mold of your hand from school. These things I wish for you – tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness. To me, it’s the only way to appreciate life.

INSTRUCTIONS FOR LIFE Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully. Memorize your favorite poem. Don’t believe all you hear, or spend all you have, or loaf all you want. When you say, “I love you,” mean it. When you say, “I’m sorry,” look the person in the eye. Be engaged at least six months before you get married. Believe in love at first sight. Never laugh at anyone’s dreams. People who don’t have dreams don’t have much. Love deeply and passionately. You may get hurt, but it’s the only way to live life completely. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name-calling. Don’t judge people by their relatives, or by the life they were born into. Teach yourself to speak slowly but think quickly. When someone asks you a question you don’t want to answer, smile and ask, “Why do you want to know?” Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk. Call a relative. Let them know you care. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson. Follow the three R’s: Respect for self, Respect for others, and Responsibility for all your actions. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice. Marry a person you love to talk to. As you get older, his/her conversational skills will be even more important. Spend some time alone. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer. Read more books. Television is no substitute. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time. Trust in your beliefs but lock your car. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life. Do all you can to create a tranquil, harmonious home. In disagreements with loved ones deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past. Don’t just listen to what someone is saying. Listen to why they are saying it. Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality. Be gentle with the earth. Pray or meditate. There’s immeasurable power in it. Never interrupt when you are being flattered. Mind your own business. Don’t trust anyone who doesn’t close his/her eyes when you kiss. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before. If you make a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are living. It is wealth’s greatest satisfaction. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it. Live with the knowledge that your character is your destiny. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

You should develop supportive relationships with people who can play one or more of the following roles in your life: ?? Confidence Builder ?? Challenger ?? Motivator ?? Sustainer ?? Friend